Cluck and Tweet

SpirituAli-T: On God and Etsy

 

I've been brainstorming names for a new Etsy shop.  The one I have now (GlassAli) evokes images only of glass, and I'm okay with that since I do make glass beads.  

 

But I also make jewelry outs of gem stones and crystals with no glass beads in sight, so shouldn't I have a shop just for those items?

Feel free to chime in any time.

I've been brainstorming names.  WhimsicAli (someone already has this on Twitter).  Glimmer in the Woods (too long and does it really evoke pretty jewelry? Or 25¢ that someone lost while on a nature walk?).  Creek Side Studio (um, already taken about 5 times).  Lakeside Studio (already take about 500 times).  Some name that rhymes with "Ali."  Like ClassicAli (except that my jewelry isn't necessarily classic).

Not so easy, is it?

So, for now, I'll be GlassAli.  Even though, unbeknownst to me when I claimed the name, there's already a GlassAllie on Etsy.  And she makes glass beads.  And jewelry. And I thought I had covered all the bases when I checked out the name.

If I had a Personalized T-Shirt Shop, I would name it PersonAli-T.  But I don't.  Yet.  

So, lest you think this is completely a post on self-promotion, which I in no way intended it to be, I decided to mention my real intended theme:  Spirituality.  Which I like to call

SpirituAli-T

like it's all about me.

Not really.  It's about the fact that today is Sunday and that for over a year now I've felt very ostracized and a bit betrayed by my church for a couple of reasons that I won't go into here.  The events that precipitated these feelings have, on a very positive level, led me to question some of my beliefs (not the big ones, just the ones where humans are involved), and shown me that the church building along with blind faith is not enough.  And that confrontation, when done right, is not only good, it's necessary. 

So today I attempted to "attend" church through its live feed.  

I lasted about 3 minutes.  And then we all watched this:

And I got more out of 10.5 minutes than 3 months of sermons.   It's genuine, as Sam says.  

A couple weeks ago I posted this on my Facebook status:

Does going to Wal-Mart instead of church count for something?

Tammy responded:  yup!  feeding the hungry! :)

and Tom, a minister for his whole adult life, responded: @Tammy, my thoughts, too! BTW, Alison, what's for dinner today?

Sara, a former student of mine, who has a baby (this absolves you of all guilt, in my book), was also looking for assurance and wrote: Does sleeping in like a sloth instead of going to church count for something?

Tammy, bless her, had just the right words: yup! restoring the body, mind , soul....

Tom let her know that he is more than ready for some sloth-like behavior fairly soon.  Which we'll believe when we see.

I appreciated the genuineness.  The non-judgmental responses.  And the fact that when my dad called later that day he didn't ask if I had gone to church.  

You know, I think Christianity is all about the people.  Well, of course it's all about God and Jesus, too, but I think that They want us to be all about the people we're put on earth with.  To comfort them and help them and deal with them and forgive them.  

Which is what I'll have to remember the next time I go to church.  

it's a sunshine day....everybody smilin'

I'm in a mood. 

 A really really good mood.

  Why? 

Sun.  Shine.

  Light.  The prospect of SPRING.  Mostly, it's the sunshine. 

 The sunshine for the last 5 days.  Warm, mellow, yummy sunshine.  I would like to  scoop it up with a spoon and lick that spoon clean. 

SO, because the sun is shining, I've accomplished nothing.

 Well, I've accomplished sitting in the living room or front porch reading in the sunlight.

I've watched the boys play catch in the yard for hours. And I let them do this without asking about their homework.   

 I've opened some windows, to bring in the fresh March air (really, because we shut our windows for good in November and that only means we've been soaking in some really really old air)

I've thought about painting the whole house Sherwin Williams--champagne.  Because it looks like any room painted this color is sunlit.  So far, only the downstairs hall is champagne.  I've got a way to go.  

(it looks a LOT better in person...on a wall)

 I've decided that the light fixtures should be changed.  ( These are my in-sunshine thoughts...they are not deep)  This is what I'm thinking: 

  from Ikea. 

and I'm thinking about this one:
also from Ikea.

Not to forget to mention this:
from  http://www.etsy.com/shop/eqlight

Yep, I'm making decisions today.  On the porch with some lemonade.  In between laundry and bills and carpool and dinner. 

If you have sunshine where you are...enjoy.  If not...it's coming.  I promise.

--deborah

Read It and Weep. What Your Child Is Reading Now.

 

 

I might just completely boycott the adult fiction area of the book store and go straight to the young adult section.  And when I say "adult," it is totally not what you're thinking.  There isn't that kind of section in the book stores that I frequent, and even if there were I'm sure it would be called "erotica," or something else more sophisticated.

But there isn't an erotica section in my book store, either.  Not that I've been looking for it.

Last week's foray into young adult literature led to two books read by both Sam and me.  One is I Am the Messenger by Markus Zusak, the same author of The Book Thief.   Let me say again that I was blown away by The Book Thief.  And let me say now that I was blown away by I Am the Messenger.  Let me also say that neither my 11-year-old boy or 13-year-old daughter will be reading this any time soon.

Ed is the protagonist of the story.  He lives in a working-class neighborhood in a working-class town. He's not just smart, he's intelligent, yet highly unmotivated, employed as an underage cab driver and living with his smelly dog (well, aren't they all in some way or another?) in a tiny run-down apartment.  He's in love with one of his best friends, Audrey, a damaged girl who has feelings in return but who can't allow herself emotions that might lead to hurt.  So she sleeps with other guys and Ed knows it.  And he wants her and is quite explicit in his want for her.  He's also open and tender and willing to take her on her terms, but I'm not ready to have that conversation with my children.  Yet.

Let's just say that Anne of Green Gables never smelled like sex.  Of that I can be certain.  Nor did Black Beauty.  Or Percy Jackson.  

We'll stick to those characters for the time being.

There's also quite a lot of swearing which is perfectly authentic for 19-year-olds.  But there's a lot of growing and maturity from 13 to 19 and this leads me to question why in the world this book is even considered Young Adult literature.  

I Am the Messenger is also quite violent.  

I'm not an adherent to violence.  I don't enjoy watching it.  I don't enjoy reading about it.  Perhaps I'm overly empathetic, but I avoid violence at all costs.  That being said, I have to admit that the violence in this book is not only the opposite of gratuitous, it's actually necessary.  Which, I know, is the opposite of gratuitous.  

There's a rape.  There's retaliation for the rape.  There are beatings.  And then more beatings.  There's bleeding and bruises and crying.

That was me crying.

Yes, I cried while reading this book.  And I wasn't even hormonal.  I wasn't even sad.  I was moved.  I was moved down to the core by this book and its possibilities.

Because Ed is a messenger.  He is on the receiving end of anonymous messages that are written on playing cards, specifically the aces of each suit.  He must

protect the diamonds

survive the clubs

dig deep through the spades

feel the hearts.

And he does.  And so do we.  And it's such a worthwhile journey.  A journey paved with people, which is really why we're all put on this planet, isn't it?  Isn't it about the people who happen to inhabit this world at the same time we do?

I will recommend this book to my children without reservations. Okay, with a few reservations.  Reservations that are greatly subdued by the greater truths held in the book.   But probably not until they are around 16 and the truths have some place to take root.  Childhood is such a short amount of time, and the weight of the world can wait for awhile.

How about you?  Do you hold off on what your children can or cannot read?  Or do you allow them to read just about anything that appeals to them since it's better than not reading at all?  I'd love to hear your reading philosophy.  Because this parenting gig consists of a lot of holding my breath and hoping I'm doing the right thing.

...alison...

jonesing for a three-way and other secrets

There are days when I crave junk-food.  Ususally candy.  Junk candy.  I'm most certain it's the sugar.  Sugar is crack.  Really. Well, technically it's not, but it's addictive. 

 But, sometimes I crave a three-way.  Yep.  All steamy and yummy.  And cheesy. 

Keep reading.

 I spent a lot of time in Cincinnati in my early 20's.  I had a "friend" from Cincy.  He turned me onto the three-way.  Then became a vegetarian.  But I haven't seen him in 17 years except for the 14 seconds he walked past me in Whole Foods last Thursday.  (and didn't notice me, that's a whole other story)

Anywho, when I get these cravings,  driving to Cincinnati and pulling into a http://www.skylinechili.com/   isn't always feasible.  It's a 4 hour drive in good weather and easy traffic.  And that would mean it is a 4 hour drive back as well.  But, after searching the internet for a reasonable fake-out  recipe and tweaking it a bit, I think I've found my answer. It goes like this:

1 tbsp olive oil

1/2 cup chopped onion

1-2 pounds ground turkey ( I use the 97% lean turkey, but you can certainly use ground beef, like Skyline does)

1 tbsp chili powder

2 tsp ground cinnamon

2 tsp ground cumin

1/2 tsp ground allspice

1/2 tsp ground cloves

30 oz  beef broth (but I think you could go with vegetable broth or chicken broth)

30 oz tomato sauce

3 tbsp cider vinegar

1/4 tsp ground cayenne pepper

shhhh...the secret ingredient, semi-sweet chocolate chips, about 1/4 cup

1 box whole wheat spaghetti ( Skyline uses regular spaghetti, but we like the whole wheat pasta)

lots of finely shredded mild cheddar cheese

1. Heat oil in pan and add chopped onions.  Stirring frequently, until tender.

2. Add all liquids and spices into crock pot (I LOVE my crock pot).   Add ground turkey (or beef) RAW to the crock pot.  Add cooked onions.

3. Add secret ingredient.  Mix well with a fork to break up meat and dissolve spices into liquid.  Reduce heat to low; cover and simmer at least 3 hours, stirring occasionally. 

4. Serve over hot, drained spaghetti.  Top with shredded cheese. 

It is even better the second day, if you have any left.

 To make a 4-way add diced white onion or red beans.  5-way adding both the onions and beans along with the shredded cheese. 

My boys EAT. THIS. UP. They are beginning to crave the three-way, though I think we will rename this meal, Spaghetti-the Cincy way.

Censorship. It's My Responsibility as the Adult. And Why Is There So Much S-E-X in These Young Adult Novels?

  

 I am the adult.  Sometimes I have to remind myself of this.  

Back in the day, when I had a room full of teenagers held captive by classroom rules and truancy laws, I would sometimes pause my words of wisdom and think to myself,

"I think they're actually listening to me!  Do they know I have no idea what I'm talking about?"  

And then I'd wax poetic about tone of voice, or symbolism or how I've always remembered the difference between metaphor and simile by remembering this pneumonic device:

Smile like an as(s).  

Because the word simile reminds me of the word smile.  And similes use like and as.  Not ass.  But close enough.  And just so you know, I never actually said the word ass.  Actually, if I had they probably would have listened to me.  

Now I sometimes pause and think to myself,

"I am the parent." 

And then I have to do some parent-y job like talk about s-e-x (because no one else is going to do it) or proper table manners, or how to remember the difference between metaphor and simile.

Now as the parent I find myself reading young adult literature in an effort to keep my daughter from reading things like Judy Blume's Forever, which I read in sixth grade.  And probably shouldn't have.  Because it is nothing like Are You There God, It's Me Margaret.  And it's pretty much the opposite of Super Fudge.  

Fortunately I love young adult fiction.  One of my favorite books ever was Little Women.  And Eight Cousins.  And my heart warms a little when I spy Anna curled up over Anne of Green Gables.  The Book Thief is close to brilliant, and because it was written for a young adult audience, the book is cheaper to buy.  Bonus!

I'm always on the lookout for new, well-written young adult books that don't have main characters who are on the prowl or going to camp in an effort to find a guy to sleep with.   But I don't always have the time to read them before Anna gets to them.  Here are some brief critiques of books I have read.  Maybe it will give you insight into whether or not your child is ready for them.  

 Twilight series:  I've read them all.  And really, really enjoyed them.  That said, I'm 44 years old and can separate fact from fiction.  Most of the time.  One of the first things I said to Anna was, "Edward Cullen does not, and will never, exist."  Because the romantic aspect of these books is incredibly, well, romantic.  To have some hot, hot guy think that you are the most desirable person on the planet is a bit heady, to say the least.  Obviously geared to girls.  Or women.  

What I like about this series: 

1. There is no sex until the characters are married.  

2. Edward is chivalrous and quite chaste.

3. It is swooningly romantic. (Really?  "Swooningly" didn't come up in my spell-check?  I thought for sure I made that word up!)

4. It's a very imaginative premise that carries you away from the first chapter.

What makes me hesitate:

1. Bella is very forthright in her desire to become a vampire.  Which euphemistically means that she pressures Edward for sex.  This is not a characteristic I want to promote in my daughter.  

2. Some of the sections are quite violent.  And a bit scary.  And I'm a chicken.

I told Anna that if she wanted to read the last two books, we'd have to have "the talk."  She has never expressed any desire to finish the series.  Even after we had "the talk."

 

Graceling:

I'm not a big fantasy fan.  I read The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, but didn't finish the series until a couple of years ago.  And that was by listening to them on tape.  That being said, I was entranced by this book.  It's about an 18-year-old girl who is born with a "grace."  Gracelings eventually expose themselves when their eyes develop into two different colors.  And a grace can be anything from being able to cook a mean hollandaise to being able to kill people effortlessly.  Which happens to be the grace bestowed upon Katsa.  I was immediately swept away with the story.  Katsa is a strong heroine who also has quite the chip on her shoulder.  Again there is sex.  Anna read the book before I did (Sam also read it and thoroughly enjoyed it), but after I read it I made sure to talk to her about the sexual relationship in the book:  it's between Katsa and a young man whom she trusts implicitly and who would never betray her, but whom she will never marry.  We talked about how important trust is in a relationship.  And how deciding to have sex is not a decision to take lightly.  Truly, any opening into this type of conversation is good.   It's also good to know before running out and buying the book for your child.  

Have I mentioned that this is mainly a one-sided conversation?  And that I think she might be humming a Taylor Swift song in her head as I blather on?  

 

Fire: 

This novel is by the same author as Graceling, Kristin Cashore.   You might want to check out her blog since it has fascinating insight into her process as a writer.  

Fire is a companion to Graceling.  Not a sequel.  Not a prequel.  A companion.  A story that takes place almost at the same time with a character or two in common.  It's about Fire, a female monster who is so beautiful that she causes men to want to possess her.  There's mention of rape.  And men wanting to harm her.  What was really valuable was when Sam mentioned that he found it disturbing that Anna may read this.  So we decided that he should be the one to talk to her about the treatment of Fire by many of the men in the novel.  How it is unacceptable to treat a woman this way.  Again, was she humming a Black Eyed Peas song or nodding in agreement?  I don't know.  It's just our job to keep talking.  

Fire also has sex with her best friend.  When she is 15.  Enough already, people!  Why?  Why?  Why?  

I just had to get that out.  Thanks.

Anyway, there it is.  There's sex in this book, too.  So we talked about that, too.  And how this act seemed very nonchalant to Fire but not necessarily to her friend.  And how it's definitely not an act to take lightly.  No matter what you read.  

This reading thing is hard work.  

But not as hard as this parenting gig.  

If you have favorite young-adult novels, feel free to share them here!  And next week I'll tackle The Dairy Queen series and perhaps something more appropriate to the male species.  

Halloween: It's Not Just for October Anymore

 

Last October when this post was fermenting in this little brain of mine, I was quite busy walking dogs and feeling sorry for myself and making costumes and feeling sorry for myself and attending soccer matches. And perhaps feeling a bit sorry for myself.  But Halloween really brings out the personality in my kids and rather wait for next October, I figure I'll beat the rush.

My very favorite picture of my children (Anna, who is now 13, and Jimmie, 11) is still the one at the top of this post.  Anna is still all about horses.  And cats.  And dogs.  This is the child that when I once said, "I think you like the dog better than me,"  she replied, "Oh no!  I like you both the same!"

And Jimmie, who insisted on wearing swim trunks over his jeans and had a rubber "cow hat."  I think the Santa pin is a nice touch.  This is not a costume you can find in stores.  Just so you don't go running out looking for a swim trunk/cow hat/Santa pin costume.  You'll be looking a long time.  

 

Obviously, a year or two later we have progressed to a princess (who is either cursing or blessing her brother) and Bob-the-Builder.  Who no less than 30 minutes before this picture was an M&M Chicken.  The M&M Chicken costume was all the rage that year.  We had to get to the store the night before and wait in line to be the first one in to nab that costume.  

Right.

Aunt Harriet had sent Jimmie a rubber chicken mask that was actually very artistic and cool.  Not like what you're imagining right now.  It was made of individual pieces of foam rubber and included a string to open and shut the beak.  It went very well with the M&M costume handed down from Aunt MeMe.  A natural pairing.  But before heading out to go trick-or-treating, Jimmie changed his mind and went with the Bob-the-Builder look.   Not as avant garde, but it also needs no explanation.

Harbor Springs has an annual Halloween Parade that includes the high school band and all the kids from preschool to kindergarten parade through the town in their costumes.  It's just one of the reasons to live here.  This was the year that Jimmie was a bush.  Not George Bush.  And definitely not a tree.  We had told him perhaps six months prior that his hair "looked like a bush,"  and that's all it took.  He thought a bush would be a great costume.  And, aside from being hot and heavy and hard to see out of, he loved that costume.  People remarked on it.  It made them laugh.  And he won the "Best Costume" award at the house across the street from our friend John.  The prize was an extra large Hershey's almond bar.  I won't really go into the fact that most kids don't like almonds.  And that the Hershey bar sat, unopened, on his desk for months.  It was just nice being nominated.  

 (imagine this with a head coming out of it)
 

The year before he was a thunderstorm.  That was a good costume, I must say.  I can't find a picture of it, but if you close  your eyes, I will describe it to you:  two pieces of cardboard cut out in the shape of a cloud with a circle cut out in front for the head and a thunderbolt hanging down.  The cloud had fluffy cotton glued on it and it was spray painted silver in areas to create a "cloudy" feel.  My coat was also spray painted silver.  As is the table on our deck.  Jimmie got to carry a spray bottle filled with water, too.  To use selectively, of course.  

You may now open your eyes.  

Anna was a Halloween present that year.  I would recommend this costume even if the picture is a bit blurry because it is EASY!  And when I say "easy" I mean night-before-Halloween easy.  Which is my number one criteria for a costume.  

 

This year, 2009, both kids were still excited to dress up and go trick-or-treating.  And I don't know when the cut off should be.  Perhaps when they no longer dress up?  Like I did one year, in 7th grade.  I put on a straw hat and colored my face blue.  I have no idea what I was supposed to be.  I guess I just wanted some candy.

This year Anna wanted to go to the Halloween shop where I could have easily spent $100 on each costume and where I overheard "Grandma" tell her granddaughter that the stripper costume was a great choice.  

As great costumes are wont to do, they evolve and Anna, who started off wanting to be some sort of cowgirl (predictably, but truly) ended up being this:

 ...the ghost of a dead clown.  It was all about the clown shoes for her.  And it was a rather scary costume in the dark.  If you're afraid of clowns.

Jimmie's wish was to be toxic waste.  But that's rather hard to come by.  And dangerous, so he opted for regular trash:

Who knows what 2010 will bring.  But I guarantee it will be scary.

Boo!